Amnesia
by Silver and Opals
Summary: She was the person he wanted to protect the most, and she doesn’t even remember their past. Now she’s dating Kira and Hitsugaya’s heart is broken. Will this love story end happily? Or will Aizen’s invasion destroy all of Hitsugaya’s dreams? On Hiatus
1. Day 1: Let me hate the world

**Summary: Hitsugaya would have done anything for Momo to be herself again—alive, happy, and with him. Right now she's alive and happy, but at the cost of her memories. Hitsugaya slowly helps her get through life while sparks fly in the air. Hitsugaya wants Momo back with him, but little does he know that a certain blonde lieutenant has his eyes on the same girl. Rated T for my potty mouth, just in case.**

All righty, so this is my first romance-drama type fanfic. Please be kind and offer suggestions if needed, and please review.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach

* * *

**Chapter One: Let me hate the world**

It was a perfect, beautiful, cliché day. The sun was shining beautifully and there was not a wisp of clouds in the blue sky. Light laughter found its way into the ears of the shinigami who were enjoying the fine day. A gentle breeze ruffled the curtains of the tenth division offices slightly. It was a perfect day.

Captain Hitsugaya Toshirou hated it all.

He hated sunshine and warm weather enough as it was, but today was the worst. At least if it was raining he'd have half a decent excuse to hate the world.

Hitsugaya laid his brush down and rubbed his eyes. _Stupid, lazy, good for nothing lieutenant,_ he thought. _Never doing her paperwork..._ but in his heart, he knew that Matsumoto was not the real problem.

Unohana Retsu had told the captains at a meeting last week that Momo's condition had been growing steadily worse. Apparently, Hitsugaya's beloved childhood friend was contemplating suicide and had lost the will to live.

"_We will do everything we can to keep her alive," she had said. "But in the end, if Momo does not want to live we cannot force her._"

"_Why?" Hitsugaya had shouted. "Please, let her live!" _For my sake, _he almost added. _

_Unohana looked anguished. "Even if we force her to live, it will do nothing but harm. Her mind is thinking suicidal thoughts right now. The only thing we can do is kill her right now, if you really want to help her."_

"_Hell, no."_

"_Then let Momo make her own choice. Perhaps she will choose to stay alive for, ah, a special someone?"_

"Maybe a special someone, but I doubt it's me," Hitsugaya thought aloud, "She'll just live to see Aizen again."

"Are you talking to yourself, Taicho?" Matsumoto asked lazily, as she was napping on the sofa.

"No."

"Don't worry. I have extra sake. Drink your problems away!"

"I am not one of your drinking buddies," Hitsugaya snapped. A vein by his neck was threatening to burst.

"You could be."

"That would be pointless and stupid. Why would I?"

"Because grownups drink sake, and you wanna be a grownup, right? So you can 'protect that innocent little girl...'" Matsumoto trailed off, quoting Kusaka.

Hitsugaya banged his head against his desk. "Leave me alone..." Just then, a black hell butterfly flew in threw the window.

_Captain Hitsugaya, this is an order from Captain Unohana. Please report to the Fourth Division hospital immediately. Patient number 234, Hinamori Momo has woken up. Again, please report to the hospital at once._

The white-haired captain's head shot up immediately. "Don't get too drunk, Matsumoto," he called before shunpoing away.

"Have fuuuun!"

_Did Momo really wake up?_ Hitsugaya asked his zanpakuto as he ran.

There was a slight pause. _**Yes, she did wake up.**_

_Is she well?_

Another pause. _**You will see for yourself.**_

_Won't you tell me any more?_

_**No.**_

Slightly angry, he ended the conversation abruptly, thoughts racing through his head. _Just last week she was thinking about killing herself. Is she really well? If this is a prank, I will kill Unohana._ Taking a deep breath, he walked into the hospital, wondering how Momo was.

"Let me see Momo!" he yelled at a nurse.

"You will have to see to it that these forms are filled out first," the nurse replied nervously. "Hinamori-fukutaichou has gotten well only several minutes ago. We would like for her to rest."

"Listen, I got a hell butterfly from Unohana. You better let me in, or—"

"Hitsugaya-Taichou? I would like to talk with you," Unohana said calmly, appearing suddenly and interrupting his rant.

"Finally."

The fourth division captain directed him into a waiting room. The room was wallpapered with pink and yellow roses and smelled like apple pie. It was comforting, but for Hitsugaya it was only nerve-wracking.

"I trust you got my message?"

"Yes," was the curt reply. "Can I see Momo now?"

"You need to understand something. What Momo will be like now is of her own choice, so do not object to it. Hinamori is not like her previous self now, she is very different, and I must ask you to respect that."

"Sure, sure."

"Momo asked me to carry out the treatment for her, and its effects are permanent. Now, are you sure you want to see her?"

"Yes," Hitsugaya replied firmly.

"I admit I was thinking about what you said to me at the meeting, for I too, would like Hinamori to continue living. What we did were selfish things, but she is alive." Unohana sighed.

"And that's the most important thing! Now, can I see her?"

Unohana looked sad for a slight moment. "The effects are permanent," she repeated.

"So what is she? Bald? I don't care."

"Come with me," she said with another sigh, taking him to Momo's room.

_Momo! Are you really well? I'm sorry for knocking you out, and I'm sorry for not being able to protect you. It's my fault completely, but I'll find a way to make it up to you, I promise._

"You can go in now," Unohana whispered. "Please don't overreact."

Hitsugaya threw open the door and saw the small girl sitting on the bed peacefully, staring out the window. When she heard the door slam, she turned towards her guests and smiled in a way that broke Hitsugaya's heart.

"Hello, Captain," she said politely, taking note of the white haori. "I'm Hinamori Momo. What's your name?"

Hitsugaya felt his heart drop to the floor. _Is that what Unohana meant by 'permanent effects?' Has Momo lost her memory?_

"What's your name?" she asked again.

"Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro," he said, still shocked.

"It's nice to meet you, Captain Hitsugaya!" Momo flashed another smile.

_No, we've met before._

"It's very nice to meet you as well, Hinamori-fukutaichou."

_No, I know you, Bed-wetter Momo._

"It's a nice day, isn't it, Captain Hitsugaya?"

_No. Why didn't you call me Shiro-chan?_

"It's perfect, Momo."

_No, it's the most horrible day of my life._

* * *

Very dramatic? Or not enough? Please R&R and give me feedback.


	2. Day 1: Smile

**Chapter Two: Smile**

Hitsugaya felt Unohana guide him to the same apple pie scented waiting room.

"I know you have a lot of questions," she said quietly. "So please wait here. I have other patients I have to check on, but I will answer whatever you ask when I return." Unohana put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him down onto the sofa. "Sit. You said so yourself—what matters is that Momo is alive, so don't look like she died. Try to be happy for her, okay?"

Hitsugaya nodded wordlessly and let himself sag into the soft cushions. "But why—"

Unohana cut him off there. "I will answer your questions when I get back." She smiled in a maternal way. "Don't worry; it won't take longer than half an hour." With those words, she left the waiting room and closed the door behind her.

For the first time in about a week, Hitsugaya forced his thoughts away from Momo. He then took his first good look at the room he was in. It was wallpapered with a pink and yellow rose design that gave the entire room an elegant air. The cream-colored sofa he sat in faced a dark wooden coffee table with a glass surface. A small window was behind him, its light pink curtains fluttering in the warm summer wind.

He walked over to the window and sighed. "I've lied to you again, Momo," he said quietly. "This day is far from perfect."

* * *

_This day is perfect! _Kira Izuru thought as he was shunpoing. _The sun is bright, the birds are singing, and Momo's all better!_ These were some of the happiest thoughts he had in many weeks.

Just an hour ago or so, when Unohana sent a hell butterfly to Hitsugaya, Kotetsu Isane also sent hell butterflies to the lieutenants telling them that Momo was well. Kira had rejoiced at the news and headed to the hospital immediately. However, he did not know that Momo had traded her memories for her health.

"May I see Lieutenant Hinamori Momo?" Kira asked Yamada Hanatarou, who was currently in charge of the front office.

"Cer—certainly," Hanatarou stammered. He had not yet been told that Momo was not supposed to have any visitors. "Right this way."

"Thank you," Kira said politely. He took a deep breath and opened the door—harder than he intended, as the door slammed against the wall and left a small dent.

"Shit!" he swore, examining the wall. "I hope they don't make me pay for this..." A light, bubbly laugh distracted him from the dent. _Momo?_ he thought in wonder.

"You're funny!" she said with a smile, miming him slamming the door. "You left a dent in the wall, then you said 'I hope that I don't have to pay for this...'" she imitated. "I'm Hinamori Momo. What's your name?"

_What's going on?_ "I'm Kira Izuru, Lieutenant of the Third Division," he said stiffly.

"A lieutenant? Wow!"

"What's so impressive about it? You're a lieutenant, Momo!"

Momo cocked her head, as if thinking. "I am? Oh, yes. But Unohana-taichou said that others would help me run my division while I'm in the hospital, so I'm really only an 'acting lieutenant.'" She made air quotes with her fingers, still smiling.

Kira was going crazy now. _Has Momo completely lost her mind? Or am I the crazy one here? Maybe this is just a crazy dream and I'll wake up soon, drunk with Matsumoto. _He pinched himself hard. "Ow!" he screamed. "That hurt!"

"Of course it would. You pinched yourself," Momo stated matter-of-factly. She pointed to a wooden chest facing her bed. "Can you pour me a cup of water?"

Kira walked over to the crystal pitcher and poured some water into a teacup that had a peach blossom design on it. "Here you are," he said, handing the cup to her. "Be careful, don't spill it."

"Thanks!" she drank the cool water thirstily, and for several minutes the room was silent except for Kira's ragged breathing and Momo's quiet sips.

_Okay, think about this rationally, like Hisagi-sempai would. One, I'm crazy. Two, Momo is crazy. Three, Momo has lost her memory. _Kira didn't feel like a lunatic, and as he glanced at Momo he didn't find her particularly crazy, so it must be that Momo has lost her memory. _But that's impossible, isn't it?_ Regardless, he decided to test the theory.

"Momo," he said slowly. "Do—do you remember who your childhood friend was?"

"I don't have a childhood friend. I was born here in Seireitei to the family of a nobleman. Then, when he died, Unohana-taichou became my foster mom. That's what she told me."

Kira let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. _If Momo doesn't remember Hitsugaya, then she wouldn't care if I asked her out... would she?_ "Momo, would you like to... er... would you like to have dinner with me... or go out... or something else... when you get released from the hospital?" his words were stilted and unsure, as he was very nervous.

"Sure!" her smile grew even larger. "I'd love to go out with you, Kira-kun!"

"I'll call you later," Kira said faintly as he left her room. _If this is a dream, please don't let me wake up._

* * *

"I understand now," Hitsugaya said quietly. He and Unohana had finished discussing Momo's amnesia, and he was ready to leave the room. "I will stand by her decision all the way, and I shall protect her with every bit of strength I have."

Unohana smoothed her long braid. "Thank you."

Hitsugaya left, closing the door quietly behind him as he headed back towards Momo's room. _It's... so much to take in. But if Momo is happy, then the least I can do is to support her._ His right hand closed around the doorknob when he heard a voice. _Kira?_

"Would you... like to go out... when you get released?"

"I'd love to go out with you, Kira-kun!"

For the second time in less than two hours, Hitsugaya felt his heart break into several little pieces. He headed back to his division in a daze, too shaken to even yell at Matsumoto for drinking in the middle of the day. As he sat in his office doing paperwork, he realized that he just couldn't care about anything anymore; he was numb. _What the hell happened? Did Kira really ask Momo out? Did she really say yes?_ Hitsguaya sank lower in his chair. _It's your own damn fault,_ he yelled at himself mentally. _You knew her for all those years but you never asked her out. So of course someone else would take that chance that you gave up. Stupid, stupid, idiot!_

Hyorinmaru materialized suddenly and roared. _**Will you shut up already? I'm trying to sleep.**_

_It's mid-afternoon! Why would you be sleeping?_

The great ice dragon yawned, and the temperature of the office dropped several degrees. _**Well, it doesn't matter now. So, what do you want?**_

_What do you mean 'what do I want?' You just materialized out of nowhere! Shouldn't I be asking you what YOU want?_

_**You're troubled, aren't you?**_ Hyorinmaru asked, delicately avoiding Hitsugaya's questions. _**If Unohana said that Momo will be better without her memories, then you should trust her. **_

_It's not... it's not that. _In the most brief way he could, Hitsugaya told his zanpakuto spirit about what he had heard between Kira and Momo.

_**That's all?**_ The dragon laughed, a sound which resembled a hailstorm.

_What do you mean 'that's all?' _Hitsugaya shouted in his mind. _Kira asked Momo out!_

Hyorinmaru wrapped its body around the desk, nearly freezing it, but Hitsugaya didn't mind. _**So do you finally admit you have feelings for the girl?**_

Hitsugaya blushed. _Go take a nap,_ he snapped.

* * *

Kira was in a blissful state of mind. _Momo agreed to go out with me! _Those were his only thoughts as he did the paperwork. A yellow telegram with a title of 'REQUEST' caught his eye.

"Oh well, I'll say yes," he said aloud, stamping the sheet of paper. "I'm having a good day. I think others should have one too!" He called for a seated officer to take the order to Yamamoto.

In his high spirits, Kira never bothered to read the request. The seated officer who took the telegram to the sotaichou only noticed three words he found odd—'_Signed, your Captain.'_

"Kira-fukutaichou must be drunk," the officer concluded. "We don't have a captain."

* * *

"Did your request go through?"

"Of course."

"Excellent..." Aizen grinned like a maniac. "Then in three weeks, hell shall break loose in Seireitei. Get the newly made arrancar ready, Gin."

"Hai, Aizen-sama."


	3. Day 2: Two Hearts

**Chapter Three: Two Hearts**

Hitsugaya Toshiro could only appreciate one thing about the new day—the fact that it was not perfectly sunny. Yet he still hated the day, because first of all, he had a terrible migraine from lack of sleep, and secondly, the infamous couple—Momo and Kira. He closed his eyes and winced; he had hardly slept last night, and his few moments of sleep were tormented by nightmares of Kira and Momo's wedding day. _I'm being stupid,_ he thought to himself. _They won't get married. _

The white-haired captain left his room and headed to his office, where he found his lazy lieutenant gossiping with the Eighth Division's lieutenant, Ise Nanao.

"Don't you have something better to do, Matsumoto?" he called as a greeting.

The strawberry blonde gave a cheery wave. "Hello to you too, my cheerful captain. Are you going to visit Momo?"

Hitsugaya groaned inwardly. "No. I'm much too busy to pay a visit to a shinigami who is not even a member of my own squad," he said coldly.

Nanao focused her bright eyes on Hitsugaya's tired ones. "Are you afraid to face Momo because she's Kira's girlfriend now?" she asked. "Because you really have nothing to worry about—I doubt Momo knows how Kira really feels about her." _Or how you feel about her,_ she thought.

Hitsugaya turned away from the intelligent lieutenant. "It's not that," he snapped as the office's temperature dropped several degrees. "I could really care less about such trivial matters. If you have nothing to tell me besides this irrelevant gossip, I suggest you leave." With those words, he stormed outside in a fume.

Matsumoto tucked her bangs behind her ears and turned to Nanao. "See what I mean? He barely yelled at me yesterday for drinking, and he didn't even complain that I messed up his paperwork! It's like he's a whole new person!"

Nanao shook her head with pity. "I guess Momo will never understand how much Hitsugaya-taichou loves her, and now they've both lost that chance."

* * *

Hitsugaya had wandered outside the gates of Seireitei and reached a small lake in a Rukongai district. In his anger, he never knew that he was making it snow around him.

"Stupid Matsumoto," he said angrily, tossing pebbles into the lake. "Stupid Hinamori. Stupid Kira. Stupid me!" The lake had completely frozen over now.

"Augh!" He climbed onto a tree and sat on one of its tallest branches, and there he stayed for a whole hour, until he decided he had to go before the civilians were dead of hypothermia.

He walked through other districts of Rukongai, taking in the startled looks he received. _Me and Momo were like that once,_ he realized. _But that all changed when she met Aizen-TAICHOU. Not just 'Aizen.' He was Aizen-TAICHOU to her. But I guess I'll always be Shiro-chan._

Too caught up in his thoughts, he realized that he had walked to where Jidanbo stood guarding the gate.

"Hello, little white-haired one," the giant said politely. "How is my little captain doing today?'

Before Hitsugaya realized what he was doing, he had brushed past the gate keeper and headed to Seireitei without even a greeting to his old friend. The only trail he left behind was a trail of snowflakes.

The tenth division captain saw how hurt the giant was. _I'm sorry, Jidanbo._ _I don't know why I acted the way I did._

* * *

Momo smoothed the snow-white sheets around her legs. _Snow..._ she thought as a wave as nostalgia washed over her. _Why does that sound so familiar?_ She glanced at her bedside table, where there was a new vase of roses. _Such a lovely red, like the color of watermelon._ She shuddered, wondering why she would think of watermelon—the bold red of the roses looked nothing like the soft colors of watermelon.

The raven haired girl leaned back on her pillows and sighed, wondering why she had said 'yes' when Kira-kun had asked her out. Of course, she didn't understand what a 'date' was until Unohana had explained it to her.

"_You see, when a boy likes or loves a girl, he asks her out to dinner so they can get to know each other better," she had said. _

"But I don't love Kira-kun," Momo thought out loud. "He's just a new friend." She pulled her knees to her chest and sighed again. "What is love?" she whispered quietly to herself.

Momo forced herself to get up and walk to the window. "I do too love Kira," she argued with herself. "He's so nice, and he's funny." She touched the curtains and laid her cheek on the windowsill. "Well, I guess I'll wait until the date is over."

* * *

Matsumoto loved romance. She loved funny romance stories, sappy romance stories, but most of all dramatic, real-life romance stories. Every drama had a matchmaker, and Matsumoto knew that it would be her role.

"When is Momo being released?" she asked Nanao.

"In a week, I believe."

"Hmm..." she picked up a pen and began to doodle on the back of some paperwork. "Only a week? Such a short amount of time for Taichou to make a move."

Nanao leaned over Matsumoto's shoulder and glanced at her drawings. "Don't you need that?"

The strawberry blonde sighed. "Oh well. Hey, what does that remind you of?" She pointed to several random lines on the papers.

"A bunch of lines and squiggles?" Nanao offered.

"Besides the obvious," Matsumoto said excitedly.

"It looks a bit like my captain's signature, if you want me to be honest. What is it that you see, Matsumoto?"

"I think it looks like a princess from one of those fairytales," she said plainly. "And this here looks like a peach. And these lines over here look like a dragon."

Nanao looked at her friend like she was crazy. "What are you suggesting?"

"Oh, Nanao-chan, you're such a good writer. How about you write a fairytale? 'Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far, away, there lived a beautiful princess named Princess Momo and a handsome prince named Prince Hitsugaya."

"Playing matchmaker will only get you in trouble," Nanao warned wisely.

Matsumoto clasped her hands together. "Oh, please, Nanao? You want them to be together as much as I do. And what better way to suggest it than through a fairytale? You know Momo loves your stories."

Nanao mused the idea over. "A fairytale... well, that would be fun to write..."

* * *

"So, you're going out with Hinamori now?" Hisagi Shuhei, lieutenant of the ninth division teased. The group of three—Kira, Hisagi, and Renji were hanging out in the third division's office.

"Not really," Kira muttered, embarrassed.

"C'mon, Kira!" Abarai Renji gave him a light punch. "We're proud that you finally made a move."

"What do you mean 'finally?' I only got the idea yesterday."

Hisagi sighed. "But come _on!_ It's not like the years at the academy were spent focusing on other girls. You loved her even then."

Kira blushed. "How did you know?"

"You're not that hard to figure out," Renji replied. "We all knew that you liked her."

"But do you think she has feelings for Hitsugaya-taichou?" Kira asked worriedly.

"Are you jealous of that little midget?" Hisagi yawned. "Don't worry about it. I mean, she lost all of her memories, right?"

"But I know Hitsugaya still cares for her, and maybe he still loves her! I don't want to lose her," Kira confessed.

Renji looked out the window, into the distance. "You can't lose what you've never had," he said softly, thinking about a certain petite shinigami.

* * *

"Aizen-sama! Unfortunately, there has been a slight problem..." an arrancar cowered in front of the powerful shinigami.

"And what is that?" Aizen replied with a hint of amusement.

"The-the fourth es-espada was kil-killed by a va-vasto lor-lorde," she stuttered. "I am so-sorry if this de-delays your pl-plans, Aizen-sama."

Aizen ran his fingers through his hair. "It was no great loss," he said slowly. "I have been meaning to create another espada anyways, for I have the assistance of a vasto lorde now." His white robes fluttered behind him as he headed to the pillar that contained the Hogyoku. "It's a fourth awake... at last."


End file.
